Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
How does it feel to date your dad?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
