Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Success! We fucked roommates!
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