So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
