I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize