Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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