he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
now i know why i became what i already was.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
