i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
you had me at cake vodka
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We have so much sex to catch up on
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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