My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
