Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize