I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
