if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
