I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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