Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
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I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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