I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize