he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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