my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
