You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
