It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
