i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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