note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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