May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize