...so i touched it.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
it's like iHOP with fire
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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