I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
he had hair everywhere except his balls
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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