your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
