I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
