btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
