I showed him my bush... on skype.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
