There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize