I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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