She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
