Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
