Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
