Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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