I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I'm at about main and main street
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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