return my video game
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
