That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
