having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
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Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
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