i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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