I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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