Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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