He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
