So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her