I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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