I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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