you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
