Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
