He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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