if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
