Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize