i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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