Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize
